He’s got the works, gives you sweet taste
Ah then you gotta split because you got no time to waste
I’m waiting for my man

In defense of Rush “Talent on Loan from Purdue Pharma” Limbaugh, the Virgin Ben outs his grandmother as a junkie:

Unlike recreational drug addiction, prescription painkiller addiction belongs squarely in the medical arena. Recreational drug addiction is just that — recreational. A junkie first picks up marijuana, cocaine or heroin in order to have a good time. No one prescribes heroin for back pain. But for many who become addicted to prescription painkillers, the dealer who gets them hooked is their family doctor.

In 1969, my paternal grandmother, known to our family as “Gaga,” became addicted to prescription painkillers. “I was in tremendous pain because of my back, and the doctors didn’t know why,” Gaga told me last Friday. “So they were giving me all kinds of pain pills, over and over and over again to try and kill the pain. They didn’t realize how much I was taking, and neither did I. Suddenly, I was addicted to them. It killed the pain. And the pain had been incredible.”

Gaga was taking 10 different types of pills per day. “They started you off with a little bit, then more and more,” she remembers. “When you’re taking painkillers, you feel great. … It’s easy to feel great. It’s easy to say, ‘Doctor, I need more pills.’

Now you’ll notice that Gaga (cute!) went to her doctor for pain pills, not her housekeeper, Rosario.


When I related Gaga’s story to Dr. Bernstein, he recognized that she “has a lot more perseverance than most people.” For many addicts, it is easier to pick up the pills and stop the pain. So that’s what they do.

Even those who check into detox aren’t guaranteed success. “Most detoxes are not effective. It’s not a medical treatment. Someone like Rush Limbaugh is not going to go into a 30-day inpatient program and hang out with a bunch of junkies talking about his issues, right? So what they end up doing is putting these people in the hospital, detoxing them for a few days and then letting them go. They’re still withdrawing, they’re still craving, and that’s why they fail.”

It is despicable how the media have equated prescription painkiller addiction with recreational drug addiction. There is a moral difference between the two types of addicts. All drug addicts deserve sympathy, but prescription painkiller addicts clearly deserve more sympathy than recreational users. Gaga says that she’d like to tell prescription painkiller addicts: “I’m with you.” The rest of us should do the same.

Let’s tackle a few fine points here, shall we?

First, we don’t know that Limbaugh was in any kind of pain (unless the pilondial cyst flared up again) when he started his slow descent into addict hell. Maybe he was a recreational user. Maybe the shame of being a fat fraud was finally getting to him. Maybe he was pining for the days when he had Clinton to kick around. Ben doesn’t know, I don’t know, only Rush knows and, for once in his life, he’s not talking. Rush “is not going to go into a 30-day inpatient program and hang out with a bunch of junkies talking about his issues”? Excuse me. Rush is/was a junkie. He was buying large quantities of drugs from his maid. He was threatening her. He was crying about it. Sounds junkie-esque to me. But Rush couldn’t or wouldn’t take the responsibility to check himself in for thirty days to clean himself up. Even though he can afford the beat treatment anywhere in the world, he took a pass. Rush once said:

“There’s nothing good about drug use,” he was saying. “We know it. It destroys individuals. It destroys families. Drug use destroys societies. Drug use, some might say, is destroying this country. And we have laws against selling drugs, pushing drugs, using drugs, importing drugs. And the laws are good because we know what happens to people in societies and neighborhoods which become consumed by them. And so if people are violating the law by doing drugs, they ought to be accused and they ought to be convicted and they ought to be sent up.”

But, you see, in Ben’s world junkies are poor people who get what they deserve. Rush is a rich famous guy who is not responsible, and doesn’t have time, and deserves pity.

Gaga may not agree…



Yeah. Like I would tell you....