Time to start lubing up…

It’s Thursday, which means it’s Noonan time tonight. What will catch her fancy this week? Let’s see, she did Lott & racism last week. And she probably won’t do a Reagan tribute right now since he hasn’t surged ahead of Strom in the 2003 Ole Yeller Sweepstakes.

I think a Christmas column may be in order. Something about God speaking to the Virgin Marisleysis about bearing his son, Jes-elian who will be born in a Miami bodega built by strapping young shirtless construction workers misted with a sheen of fine manly sweat. Later they will be visited by the Three Wise Dolphins who will warn her against swarthy, hard-eyed men from the Mideast bearing camcorders and unpaid breakfast checks from Shoneys. Then it will snow; big tumbly white flakes of white snow that make us say This is snow because it is, and it’s good because good is what it should be, and strangers will stop each other on the street and read each others minds and they will say yes, the snow is white and cold and good and there is a higher force who makes this good, cold snow that is white and is now snowing on the firemen with their tight uniforms clinging to their brave and well defined bodies, and their hoses that are full of goodness, and are taut with the expectation of meeting a middle-aged Catholic divorcee who is thinking I put my arms around him and yes and drew him down to me so he could feel my breasts all perfume yes and his heart was going like mad and yes I said yes I will yes and I could really use a cigarette right about now…

Then she will wish us all a very Merry Christmas and go have that cigarette….if Michael Bloomberg doesn’t mind.

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Yeah. Like I would tell you....