Bomb Iraq with daisycutters…falalalala lala lala

Like a child on Christmas Eve who begs “please just let me open just one present?” President Premature Invasion is shifting from foot to foot anxious to command, “Let’s roll” and give off the musky scent of vestigial manhood.

The White House is expected to declare on Thursday that Iraq has violated the United Nations resolution requiring it to disclose all its weapons of mass destruction, senior administration officials said today.

At a national security meeting scheduled for Wednesday morning, President Bush will consider whether to declare Iraq in “material breach” of its obligations, the officials said.


Senior White House officials insisted tonight that the principal advisers, who include Vice President Dick Cheney, Secretary of State Colin L. Powell and Secretary of Defense Donald H. Rumsfeld, had made no specific recommendations to Mr. Bush.

Asked if the group had agreed that Iraq was in “material breach” of its obligations, Sean McCormack, a spokesman for the National Security Council, said, “No such decisions have been taken by the United States government at any principals’ meeting, whether today or at any other time.”

Rumsfeld said,” Hey, what the heck. Might as well attack Iraq, I got nothing better to do during the holidays.”

Cheney just sat there rubbing his hands together, hissing “yesssss”, and thinking of all the lovely oil within his reach, until he achieved a massive erection which he quickly hid from Lynne who was sitting behind him, crushing the skulls of baby capuchin monkeys with her powerful mandibles and making simpering noises.

Meanwhile Bush kept his head down, studiously coloring in his White House lunchtime placemat illustrated with pictures of happy slaves picking cotton under the paternal but watchful eye of Strom Thurmond.

Looks like it time to Get Your War On.

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Yeah. Like I would tell you....