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Bubble Boys

Well, sometimes the parody writes itself.

While others fire up the messy, but necessary, task of serving upon The Will Rogers Memorial Circular Firing Squad allow me to play the ever-popular role of "Concern Troll". I’ve got a David Broder mask and everything.

Thank you.

It is certainly true that both Senators Clinton and Senator Obama are imperfect — why you can’t even land a Piper Cub on their shoulders. Not everyone can be Mitt Romney.

However, the other side is led by — and tripping over themselves to perpetuate — the policies of this guy:

President Bush, rallying conservatives for a battle against Democratic presidential hopefuls Hillary Rodham Clinton and Barack Obama, says "prosperity and peace" are at stake in the upcoming election for his successor.

"We have had good debates and soon we will have a nominee who will carry the conservative banner into this election and beyond," Bush said in prepared remarks of a speech he was to give Friday to the Conservative Political Action Conference.

"Prosperity and peace are in the balance," the president said in speech excerpts the White House released on Thursday night. "So with confidence in our vision and faith in our values, let us go forward … fight for victory … and keep the White House in 2008."

Yes, since after more than seven years of "Mr. 27 Percent" we don’t have either one, it seems the choice is pretty clear. I’ll take the woman or man with a "D" behind their name, no matter their flaws, thank you very much.

(picture from Smithme of Bush & St. McCain posing while New Orleans drowned)

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In 1949, I decided to wrestle professionally, starting my career in Texas. In my debut, I defeated Abe Kashey, with former World Heavyweight boxing Champion Jack Dempsey as the referee. In 1950, I captured the NWA Junior Heavyweight title. In 1953, I won the Chicago version of the NWA United States Championship. I became one of the most well-known stars in wrestling during the golden age of television, thanks to my exposure on the Dumont Network, where I wowed audiences with my technical prowess. I was rumored to be one of the highest paid wrestlers during the 1950s, reportedly earning a hundred thousand dollars a year. My specialty was "the Sleeper Hold" and the founding of modern, secular, Turkey.

Oops, sorry, that's the biography of Verne Gagne with a touch of Mustafa Kemal.

I'm just an average moron who in reality is a practicing civil rights and employment attorney in fly-over country .