Face the Snark
Sunday snarkotics for the week ending 7/15/06:
Sigh. Another week monopolized by the Victimized Right Wing Bloggers ("VRWBs"). Because it’s not enough that your party controls all three branches of government and is sailing the Ship of State straight into rocks more ragged than Cheney’s latest EKG. The VRWBs will not rest until they permanently silence those islamointernetisaseriesofotubesoblogofascists who challenge the VRWB’s uber-righteous indignation with amoral sarcasm and foul-mouthed satire. How dare they poke fun at your "dick schtick"? The gall of those humorless cowards who mock your blatant inconsistencies and sneer at your martyr complex! HOW DARE THEY?!?!
You’ll show them. Because there’s nothing wrong, or even illegal, with espousing violence against journalists, calling for the lynching of the Supreme Court, and using the U.S. mail to intimidate your enemies who called you names, those meanies. Nothing wrong at all.
Retardo Montalban of Sadly, No! opens the doors of his Weenie Museum. The artwork is so inspired that even a wizened atheist like myself briefly believed in a higher authority.
The Editors contemplate preemptively awarding the Palme D’Hair to the 25 morons who protested outside the New York Times building on 43rd St. earlier in the week. Carl from Simply Left Behind provides additional commentary.
Because really, most of these VRWBs are not very bright. They may think they’re clever with all those "Oh yeah? Your mom goes to college!" jokes, but their refusal to "do nuance" entertains both the elitist Bitch, Ph.D. and us. Hmm, I wonder what her dissertation was on.
We jump back to Simply Left Behind for a crash course on how to communicate with VRWBs. You might contemplate taking some Advil and a highball of straight absinthe beforehand.
Morse of Media Needle serializes the mainstream VRWBs, which in this case, stands for Victimized Right Wing Broadcasters, and via Huffington Post, Suburban Guerrilla’s Susie Madrak smacks her forehead repeatedly at the death of civility.
Meanwhile, back at the pig farm . . . erm, the ranch:
Wolcott rolls up a copy of USA Today and swats the Wall Street Journal for refusing to use the litter box.
Roy at alicublog points and laughs at homophobes Brent Bozell and Tim Graham for their assertion that the New York Times is even more satanic for supporting the Gay Games.
Oh, and there’s that G8 Summit thingy going on in St. Petersburg, Russia. NTodd gives us a quick Russian lesson in the event that we ever feel compelled to kiss some small child’s belly.
Armageddon is fast approaching in the Middle East, while Bush rides his mountain bike through the suburbs of St. Petersburg. TBogg thinks O. Henry might save the day.
General J.C. Christian endorses the new "Fetus American Exercise Program."
And Sanjay at Karmically Speaking acts as personal shopper for the VRWB home.
And my ode to Plame v. John Does No. 1-10.